Craziness Continues

When I'm at the grocery store or out to eat and I'm asked if I'd like a second [of whatever] for half price, my gut reaction is to always say yes. So, naturally when our adoption agency asked us if we'd like to add two-year old Gideon [ya, sweet name, I KNOW] to our adoption, we said yes :) This has only happened in the last two weeks or so. Thankfully, things have gone quite quickly and they were able to get his report sent to us in less than a week. At this point, all the lights are green and we are leaving Iowa with the intention of bringing home both Violet and Gideon!

We're stoked. Things are becoming more real all the time. Kristen has had two baby showers in the last week and our house looks as if it has been overrun by a preschool tornado. Most things are in order and we're attempting to prepare for the craziness that never ceases to ensue.

Speaking of craziness, a pretty cool thing happened recently. One of our good friends [Ellie] had a credit toward the airline that we're using. Ellie was also interested in going back to Africa for personal reasons. So, we inquired and it worked out for her to come with us! Now that we'll have two rug rats to look after, this will be a huge help. So, if you're wondering who the other white person is (sorry, had to), it's Ellie!

Thank you for your prayers, encouragement, and love through all of this! I look forward to posting many pictures and blogging while in Africa, but for now, this will probably be the last post before we're half a world away!

Here are our two kiddos!

Gideon - 2 years old

Violet - 3 years old

Hakunamatata! [Lion King]

Derek and Kristen [and Ellie]

COURT DATE [roller coaster ride]

It's been awhile. Everytime I think I should update you all on our adoption, I never know what to write because, frankly, things have been a confusing mess for quite some time. So here's the short [sort of] version..

After we were told that adopting Faith and Stecia wouldn't be possible, we were almost immediately referred to another 2 year old child named... Shakira (yes, as in 'My hips don't lie'). Her mother was homeless, pregnant, and recently widowed. Kira was taken into social services and placed in an orphanage via her mother's request. Things looked very promising for our adoption of Kira for awhile, but, then we were told that the government sees international adoption as a sort of "last resort" and wanted all family members to be documented as deceased. Since finding Kira's mother was next to impossible, we were told (again) that it would not be possible for us to adopt Kira.

As if we like roller coaster rides, we were very quickly referred to yet, another child! Violet is 3 years old and lives in a village with a family that has multiple children that they look after. Several of these children are orphaned. Since both of Violet's parents are documentedly deceased, things progressed quickly and it looks promising that we will get to bring her home. For the last two months, we've been told almost every week that it would be possible for us to get our court date. And yet, each week would end and we would have to tell our family and friends that they would "try again next week." Then, a judge in Uganda asked our agency if we would be interested in bringing home a SECOND child... Although it seems like we went through this with Faith and Stecia, things look promising that we could be bringing home two three-year old girls!

We were hoping for a court date in June because of my job. Since I teach, I wanted to miss as least amount of school possible. Then, yesterday, we finally received our court date. On August 24, we'll be appearing in court with little Miss Violet to become her legal gaurdians! We're super pumped, even though the timeline was not what we thought it would be. As far as child #2 goes, we still don't know if we'll be able to bring her home or not. We'll see as the summer goes on. AND, since I'm pretty much unemployed right now, I'll actually take the time to sit down and update you fine people :)

It's been a rocky ride this semester with the changes of our children and waiting and waiting for our court date, but we're so happy to finally have a concrete court date. The date they've chosen works out terribly for my job, but oh well, God has a plan and I'm just happy to be part of it.

Once again, thanks for all your support, ecouragement, and prayers! :)

Derek and Kristen

Noisy Gongs and Clanging Symbols

I can teach amazing words, but if there is no love, it's worthless


1 Corinthians 13:1, 3

"If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 

And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing."

This is one of the passages that I've come across lately that reminds me to practice patience with my students, family, and really everyone; but especially my students. My students test me day in and day out. Sometimes it seems that I can hardly keep myself together and there are many days that I fail multiple times a day. The sad part is, I'm completely aware I'm failing while I'm failing. Patience is not natural for me. 

Especially undeserved patience. Students who are lazy, unprepared, and unorganized are the most likely to tick me off. Some days, I'm ready to freak out. When I have to let the same student go get his/her book for the 25th time (no joke) or I have to give out another pencil, sign another pass to the bathroom, repeat the formula for the area of a rectangle, reiterate my directions...I'm usually steaming. 

Some days go this way (like today) and I don't know how I even make it through. Then, some days, the students are better and everything seems to flow a bit smoother. BUT, the really interesting days are when I humble myself enough to realize that God repeats, reiterates, and redirects me as well. On these days, when I humble myself, I pray for patience, energy, and enthusiasm. On these days, God shows up and I just feel... better. 

Then it hit me when I read 1 Corinthians 13. I have to have patience and love with my kids if I ever hope to give them anything more than a set of mathematical skills (which I do). If I don't have love for my kids, I don't stand a chance of being more to them than just a teacher. And frankly, I don't really care about the education near as much as the opportunity to speak truth - or even better - to show them truth. 

This was a bit of an light bulb moment for me. Its still a struggle, almost daily; but its a necessary struggle if I ever hope to be used by God in school. 

This week's math lesson..

I had a conversation with a friend of mine today that brought up something that I learned a few years ago. We were talking about how its easy to feel like those in ministry are better servants of God because they speak to dozens (sometimes hundreds) of people about Jesus every week. In that light, its easy to believe that my being a teacher will never be on par with being a pastor/ministry leader.

Then, I'm reminded of how Jesus spoke to the masses. He definitely did so, but I think his main ministry was to 12 particular guys. He poured himself into them and those 12 ministered to a few more who ministered to a few more who ministered..... Get the idea?

I heard a professor at Moody Bible Institute explain it in a way that my brain really latched onto. Mostly because it dealt with math, I think. He said that while its easy to feel like those on stage are doing a better job, sometimes, the numbers prove otherwise. Consider the following scenario...

A pastor preaches to a church of 1,000 people every Sunday. Its not possible for this pastor to personally minister to 1,000 people. He can teach them but he can't really have a deep, committed relationship with them. Because of this, its often the case that many of these people do not have a faith that goes beyond the walls of the church. A large percentage of these people are not producing disciples.

On the other hand, take a person who decides to invest heavily in 3 people. Let's say that after 2 years of investing in these 3 people, that they turned around and invest in 3 more. Two years later, all of the previous disciples disciple 3 more. If this pattern continues, 3 more people per period of 2 years become disciples of Christ who create more disciples of Christ (slightly confusing?).

For those of you who hate math, maybe just skip the next paragraph. 

This is an exponential effect. 4^x power, where x = each 2 year period displays the current number of disciple-producing disciples. After 10 years, 1 person's commitment to 3 people has (theoretically) produced 1,028 fully devoted followers of Christ.

1 ----> 4 ---->16 -----> 64 -----> 256 -----> 1,028.

Now, clearly there are other variables involved. Some people won't choose to keep living for Christ. But, the principle is still the same.

1 person's commitment of discipleship can have an exponential effect for the kingdom of God.


I don't think Jesus is running the numbers. I don't think God really cares if our efforts produced 10 more followers or 10,000 more. I think God is much more concerned about our efforts than he his about the fruit of our efforts.

However as a model for ministry, I think this is the route more churches should go. I'm not saying that we should do away with massive Sunday morning teaching and worship, but maybe we should take seriously the  affects of small, intimate communities of Christians.

Just some thoughts. What do you think? Seriously, you should respond below. Just click anonymous if you'd rather not be named!

Blindsided

Here's the latest. We got a call today regarding our adoption. It was decided that it would not be possible for us to continue to persue adopting Faith and Stecia. A number of things played into this decision:

1. Our age. While we technically meet the qualifications for the program, we are quite young.
2. The girls aren't babies. Basically, the age gap between us is causing some concern with the court system.
3. We're first time parents. Self explanatory.
4. The girls have some family around. So, depending n your definition of 'orphan,' they aren't technically orphans.

All of this put together raised concers for the social worker in Uganda that had to approve our adoption before it went to court. She feels that a judge would decide that the girls would be better off in Uganda. Those who are on the ground in Uganda that work for About a Child have done everything they can to convince the social worker that Kristen and I are fit to be parents. Their requests were eventually denied.

While this feels like a kick in the gut and Kristen and I were both pretty deflated at first, we're optimistic. This particular social worker has agreed to work with us and About a Child to find another orphaned child for us. The social worker works for an Orphanage in Uganda and is very good at what she does. If nothing else, this new relationship (with the social worker) will hopefully be an avenue for more adoptions to take place (for us and other couples around the U.S.).

Also, since we already have the necessary paperwork in place, our process for adopting a different child should go quickly (relatively speaking). Lastly, About a Child has a policy which states that if a referral falls through, the adoptive parents don't lose any money that they've paid to the agency! This is a huge sigh of relief as we've sent thousands of dollars already.

Accepting the fact that we will never be parents to Faith and Stecia is hard and will take some time. However, Kristen brought up a good point soon after we got the news. She said, " What if we needed to be this far along in the adoption process in order to adopt the child that God really has in mind for us?"

Maybe? We're unsure at this point. However, we do know that God is up to something. There are too many things that are happening for it to be anything else. We're absolutely confident that he has plans for us and this was just a necessary piece in the story. We're looking forward to the next step in this whole process and we're excited about it.

God doesn't call his people to lives of ease. A life of ease is hardly synonymous with a life of fulfillment.

Your prayers and encouragement are appreciated!

Derek and Kristen

Expectation Exceeded? Check.

More news!

So, we applied for a no-interest loan awhile back. About two weeks ago, this particular agency contacted us and said they were out of funds for their fiscal year. However, they referred us to another agency that they work with closely. It looked like we had a shot at getting up to a $5,000, no-interest loan to cover some adoption costs.

Then, we got a call to day.

Somehow, we got a $7,500 no-interest loan! How awesome is that?!?! Kristen said it best when she said "whew" as we were talking about it tonight. We had some costs that needed to be covered before we go to Uganda the first time. With this loan, those particular costs are covered!

God is continuing to teach me a lot. Coincidences seem to be happening left and right lately. However, something about them don't feel exactly like coincidence. It feels more like someone moving chess pieces around, carefully executing a plan. Our adoption funding is obviously one of those things. Another is a friend of ours who seems to have found a job in a church. The job is exactly what he was looking for. Sometimes, life can just be so exciting :)

Thank you for your prayer and support. I've heard lots of cool stories and had lots of great conversations with people that I sometimes don't normally talk to. If you haven't yet, speak up. I'd love to chat with you!

Derek

Update[s].

Update: Our paperwork is being submitted to the courts in Uganda within the next week; maybe even today! That means, all that stands between us and booking a flight to Uganda is a phone call about our actual court date!

We've had overwhelming support from family and friends. Thank you sooooo much! It's been a humbling experience as well. You see, I'm kind of a 'git r done' kind of guy sometimes. I naturally dive into things headfirst with the intention of seeking no outside help. It's definitely a pride issue for me. So, when Kristen and I starting raising support for our adoption, I was a little leery.

Through the generous prayer, encouragement, and giving of our great family and friends, I'm starting to learn that there is beauty in a collective effort; a lot of it. God is using our adoption to move within people - people that I don't even know sometimes. We get messages from people who are praying for us and it is very encouraging We've also received numerous financial donations. In fact, earlier this week, the craziest thing happened.

I was in a meeting for work (I'm having lots of those lately...) and Kristen texted me.

"Do you know such and such?"

I said, "Uh, her name sounds familiar, but I can't remember who she is. Why?"

"Well, she just deposited a large sum of $ into our paypal account" Kristen said.

WHAT?! I was floored. I was sure it was a mistake. Why would someone who I barely know and is younger than me do this? I got a hold of her yesterday and she assured me that it wasn't a mistake. She'd caught wind of our story and was inspired. God was/is working in her heart and his work in her led her to make the decision to help us financially. Wow.

------------------------------------------------------

This story in particular led to light bulb turning on in my head. Suddenly, it seemed selfish to not involve others in our adoption. By doing everything ourselves, I rid God of the opportunity to use our adoption to work in other people's lives. God can use any situation to work in the hearts of his people. Of course I want others to get a chance to be part of this!

Sometimes, I look at pictures of Faith and Stecia and it doesn't seem real. Who really thought it was a good idea for me to be a dad? Haha. Then, I was reminded of a blog post I'd read awhile back. It was from a 52 year old lady who is a mother to something like 11 kids... I know, craziness. Of the 11, 8 are adopted. Holy Cow. Anyway, she wrote a post that was a response to several questions she'd gotten about adoption. Things like..

How do you afford so many adoptions?

Aren't you and your husband getting a little old to adopt?

She responds to these questions and more with such good answers. In short, she goes back to God's heart for the orphan. Jesus was born as one of "the least of these" and God has a desire that no one should suffer, especially children. Because of God's heart for orphans, God loves to help those who are willing to care for his children. He provides ways through the seemingly impossible situations -Whether it be financial or physical.

Her blog documents several stories of God's provision in their lives; several of which center around their adopted children. I highly recommend you check out her blog. If you're interested, its listed here.

http://aplacecalledsimplicity.blogspot.com/

God uses the willing to do his work. Man, that is exciting. Thinking about these things takes away my leeriness and hesitance. I feel so alive when I think about my relationship with God, that he loves me, and wants to use me to do awesome things.

No one that God uses is great in and of themselves, they're just willing.

As one of my college professors used to say...

Happy Trails!