Unofficial, but Miraculous Nonetheless!

I'm not sure how to capture all the emotional ups and downs of this past week. It's been a blur as always and its also been especially draining. We drove to both of our kids' districts, went to see the Magistrate of Mpigi, and went to court for guardianship of both Viola and Gideon. Words can't describe how incredible this week has been. We're very happy to inform you all that things have gone well! It looks like we'll eventually be the proud parents of both little ones [currently unofficial, of course]!

So, here's the basic breakdown..

Last Thursday, we found out that our court date would be yesterday, September 27. Later on, we found out that it was darn near miraculous to get a court date scheduled in one week. Then, on Saturday, we went to Nakaseke to visit Viola. She was not happy to see us as it had been a few weeks since she'd seen us last. She didn't really interact with us at all, but it was still a worthwhile visit because it was a building block for our next meeting.

This past Tuesday, we went to Mpigi to visit the magistrate about obtaining Gideon's care order. It took a long time to get in, and when we got in, she was harsh; just like last time. She said she had her doubts about us and why we wanted the care order for Gideon. She also went as far as to say that Kristen has "bad character." All of this was made worse because Kristen had not been feeling well for several days. On this particular day, she held herself together well, despite being light headed, dizzy, and sick to her stomach. For awhile during the meeting, I thought she was not going to give us the care order. However, after much deliberation, she did grant it.

Now, Thursday.

Since we definitely did not want to worry about the traffic making us late, we left very early.  After running some errands, we found ourselves at the courthouse at 1:30 [our scheduled time was 3:00]. As 3:00 approached, I became increasingly nervous as NO ONE was there.. finally, fifteen minutes before 3:00, the Nakaseke parole officer showed up. It was around 3:30 by the time everyone else showed up. Then, we moved to another room where we found out that the judge was in a meeting that ran long. In a way, this played to our advantage as we got to interact with Viola a bit more. She was laughing and smiling because we were tickling her. At one point, she said that she would go with us if we would buy her biscuits [more of a cracker than a biscuit]! Finally, around 5:00, we were ushered in to see the judge.

For the first half an hour or so, the judge talked directly to the Nakaseke parole officer about things not really pertaining to our case. He seemed to be fairly upset with her and the practices/procedures that she's been using. After this, the mood lightened. He interviewed our case worker, Viola's grandmother, and lastly, Kristen [she did a phenomenal job, of course]. He then said these words.

"The ruling shall be on this coming Tuesday, October 2nd."

I was dismayed to hear this as I was under the impression that we would find out one way or the other right then and there. However, everyone else in the court room looked happy to hear the judge say this. Some even did some silent applauding. Then, it was on to Gideon's case. He interviewed the grandfather and also the grandmother. After this, he said again,

"The ruling shall be on this coming Tuesday, October 2nd."

I was shocked for several reasons. First of all, since most of it was hard to understand, I didn't understand why everyone seemed so upbeat. Even the judge seemed to be in a good mood. Also, I was shocked because I'd never been required to say a single thing in court. After thanking the judge, we exited the court room. It was roughly 7:30. In our conversation with the attorney afterwards, this is what she had to say.

"It is a miracle that the judge even agreed to see these cases on one week's notice and after having a meeting run long. Also, its unheard of that a judge would give the ruling in only three more days for both cases! I feel very confident that the ruling will be a 'yes.' He was in a good mood the entire time and cracking jokes! He is often a very harsh judge and dismisses many cases. This whole thing is miraculous!"

I hadn't realized the reality of all this until right then and there. Not only had all of this happened on such short notice, but we were now [unofficially] the legal guardians of both Viola and Gideon! It had never been clearer to me in that moment that God had his hand in all of this. Like our attorney had said, its nearly unbelievable that all of this would happen in the way that it did. I think the most shocking part of it all is that God would chose us to do this. Lately, its been made clear to me how far I have to go in my role as a parent. There are situations that I've handled with Gideon already that make me realize that I've got some work to do. It makes me think of all the stories in the Bible where God uses "little people to do big things." I often feel inadequate, but I know God wouldn't have called us to do this if he hadn't equipped us to be able to handle it. It also helps that we've got such awesome family and friends to help us out!

Its also right here that I have to take a minute to praise my wife. She has handled almost all of the paperwork and correspondence with our adoption agency, case worker, and attorney. Also, while being sick, she took it like a champ when the magistrate and judge picked on her. And, at this point, I feel like she has to teach me how to be a decent parent. She's been doing a great job, despite all that's been thrown at her. Basically, she's pretty awesome and I hope I don't have to sleep with Leon, in the dog house, when I get home.

Whew...

Now that we can take breath, we've still got things to get done before this whole thing is done. Our case worker told us today that he thinks getting the kiddo's passports and visas will take something like three more weeks from this coming Tuesday [date of the official ruling]. So, we'll be doing everything in our power to get this done as quickly as possible.

One rather unfortunate thing is that we originally set our return date to be October 2nd. Since this won't happen, we need to change it to some unknown later date. At this point, it's still a guess. So, we're hoping our guess will be close enough so that we don't have to change it again! Also, because we'll need to purchase 2 more plane tickets [for the kids!], we need to be sure about our date when we do set it. Its pricey to change flight dates, so pray that we get it right the first time!

Lastly, we're going to pick up Viola on Tuesday!! I'm sure this will be emotional for her. So, please please please pray that God will soften her heart towards us. Also pray for her grandmother as it will be hard for her as well. Its clear that their bond is strong and it may be painful to separate the two of them. Grandma is also 87 years old, so it's possible that this may be the last time that Viola gets to see her grandma...

So, hopefully the three grandma's she'll have in Iowa will be good  enough replacements ;) along with all the rest of you! We're very excited to get back pressurized showers, fall weather, and traffic that isn't completely insane. Most of all, we're excited to see our friends and family again!

We'll let you know how things go with Viola, the passports, visas, and departure dates asap!

Derek, Kristen, Viola and Gideon!!!!

It's GO - TIME.

Alright people, this week is THE WEEK. It's go-time. Late last week, we secured a court date for both Viola and Gideon. That date is this coming Thursday, September 27. Also, early this week, we're going to the magistrate of Mpigi again to get the care order for Gideon [this is necessary for court].

We also visited Viola again yesterday, and she was freaked out. I think she thought we were going to take her away. She kicked, screamed, and cried as any 3 year old would in her situation. We stood around outside the hut she was hiding in as our case worker talked to the grandma. For around an hour, she didn't come out to see us. At the end, our case worker brought her out, kicking and screaming, but she just went back into the hut. Needless to say, we're in need of a lot of prayer for little Viola. I don't think there's any way around how hard it will be for her to leave her grandma, pending a good outcome at court on Thursday.

If court is successful, we will work on obtaining visas for both kids from the U.S. Embassy. This is often a tricky step as well. Our attorney seems to think this will take around 2 weeks. So, if all goes well, we'll be coming back to the states in [roughly] the second week of October.

We've also got another little project we've been working on. I met the director of an elementary school one day when we were at a beach in Entebbe. He asked all about our adoption, the agency we work through, and if there would be any way we or our agency could help his school. Since then, we've visited the school and started trying to find ways to help some of the orphans there and the school itself. In particular, there is one little girl, named Brenda, who has three holes in her heart. Since medical care isn't wonderful in Uganda, they've basically decided that they will wait for her to die. We're working with the director to see if there are ways that we can help.

OK, here's the wrap-up and schedule for us this week. It will be busy/crazy/hectic/etc... so your prayers are greatly appreciated.

Monday:
 - Our case worker goes to Mpigi to try to secure the care order for Gideon.
 - Gideon goes back to the doctor to see if his intestinal infection has gotten better.
 - We'll go to meet with the director of the elementary school to get more info on the school.

Tuesday:
 - We'll go back to Mpigi [if necessary] to get the care order for Gideon.

Wednesday:
 - We'll try not to wet our pants about Thursday.

Thursday:
 - Court with Gideon and Viola

Friday:
 - Pending a good outcome on Thursday, we'll try to go to the Embassy and apply for visas for Gideon and Viola.

I'll try to post updates throughout the week, but I'm sure they won't be as detailed. I'm sure you'll understand ;)

Derek

The Debut

Wah - Wah - Wah... There really are no updates as far as the adoption process goes right now. The only thing I can tell you is that our case worker has gone to the Magistrate of Mpigi to discuss Gideon's Care Order again, today. We should hear from him soon. Also, neither court date has been assigned because the courts were at a 'conference' all last week. So, that's that.

In other news, we've had quite the time getting to know Gideon and having him run our lives. He runs and plays and giggles and bosses the other kids around. He's also not quite so protective of his food and is learning more English words everyday. He's quite a demand on us as its often difficult to figure out what he is saying. He's had a decent amount of diarrhea lately and he's also developed some kind of bump on his back. We're thinking it looks like a boil. When the doctor examined it a week ago, it was too small to really tell what it was, so we'll be taking him back in either tomorrow or Thursday. Despite these things, he acts fairly normal. The diarrhea doesn't seem to bother him and the bump only bothers him if it gets touched. 

This last weekend, our host family decided it would be fun to take us to their home village. We left on Saturday morning around 6:30. The drive took most of the morning and into the early afternoon. The kids mostly slept and weren't too annoying. The village consisted of several house-type structures; some small and some around the size of a house in America. There was no power while we were there [although I guess they have it most of the time]. Other than that, there are lots of trees, fields, hills, and livestock. One of the children took Gideon and I to the top of the tallest mountain hill around. It was an awesome view of several other small villages, other rolling hills, and fields. For a brief moment, I thought, "This must be where Lord of the Rings was filmed."

On Saturday evening, we attended an Africa wedding. It was an outdoor wedding and at first, everyone sat in plastic chairs in sort of a rectangular shape. Some man [father of the bride?] spoke for a long time, often cracking jokes [which I only know because other people laughed]. Then, these dancers would come and dance to the same song over and over. I guess they were the 'entertainment'. After awhile, many groups of women were paraded through. This is a tradition in Uganda. The groom is supposed to guess which one is his bride. Obviously, he knows which one it is, but the father of the bride gets to pick on him the entire time this is happening. After awhile, we decided to get up and eat. When we came back, the same thing was going on. Luckily, Gideon didn't feel like sitting still any longer, so we left to go play. All in all, it was sort of strange because there was no real ceremony that I could tell. I suppose it could have happened after we left. The ride to and from the wedding was around an hour and fifteen minutes. We rode in an 8 passenger van ... with 13 people.. including several children... on bumpy dirt roads. Needless to say, we were pretty tired.

The drive back to Kampala took a long time. It seemed like we were stopping every 20 minutes to buy local fruit and meat from the village people [its less expensive in the villages]. By the time we dropped everyone off and arrive back home, we'd been in the car for 8 hours. Between the whiny children and the smell of raw meat, we were both pretty irritable and Kristen was sick to her stomach.

SO, after all this, we decided that we needed to take some time away from our host family. Yesterday, we checked into a hotel, which is more like an apartment. We've got AC, TV, wireless internet, a shower with actual water pressure, screens on the windows [keeps bugs out], and an unheated outdoor pool. We've also got a balcony with a fourth floor view and a kitchen with all the appliances. Its nice to unwind a little from everything that's going on and just take some time for ourselves. 

Alright, because we have no actual updating for you, we decided we would make this Gideon's debut. He calls us mommy and daddy and I'll be a tornado if we have to give him up at this point. So, without further ado, here is the little guy :)

p.s: There are two videos right above. If you can't see them or can't play them, try on a computer. We can't seem to play them on our Ipods.

Thanks,

Derek, Kristen, and Gideon!

"Ya Kukuba!" [loving words toward hopeful future parents]

ALRIGHT. Here we go again. Everytime I blog, I feel like I have quite a story to tell and this time is no different. 

This story begins this last Thursday. 

Once again, we went to Gideon's district [Mpigi] to see the the magistrate about getting the care order for Gideon [the care order is what is necessary to obtain custody of a child]. We were led to believe that this step wouldn't be that difficult. We thought we would go to Mpigi, answer some questions, and walk away with it. 

To be nice about it, the magistrate was not a pleasant woman to speak with [and believe me, that is being nice]. She acted like it was absurd that we would want to obtain custody of Gideon and questioned us as to why. We also heard for the first time about a biological sister that Gideon has. She used this and many other things to say that there was no way she would sign a care order for Gideon. After awhile of her and our case worker talking back and forth, she decided that she would not give a care order until strong evidence was given that we would be fit to have custody of Gideon. Her "ruling" was that we would care for Gideon until September 25th and come back.

First of all, this goes against what we wanted to do because we do not yet have a court date for Gideon. However, our case worker seems to think that this won't be an issue. In fact, he doesn't think getting the care order will be an issue either; so much so, that he suggested that Gideon go back home with his grandparents. But, after seeing how things sometimes work in Uganda, we wanted to take no chances. So, we sent grandma and grandpa on their way and took Gideon home with us.

He cried a little at first [like literally 90 seconds]. Other than that, he's been AWESOME. He has been the most fun 2 year old to take care of for the last 3 days. He's an exceptionally bright little guy that loves to play with cars, crayons, and cell phones. He's picked up a few English words already and [drum roll please...] HE'S POTTY TRAINED! We hasn't had an accident yet. His signal that he has to pee is when he pulls down his pants. I'm confident that if we don't catch him doing this, he'll pee all over the floor. 

His little laugh is so cute that I'd prefer to tickle him all day. He also gets embarrassed easily. When he does, he covers his face with his little hands and smiles from ear to ear; flashing his bright little white teeth. He's quickly fitting in with the children who live here as well. He plays well with them and fights with them too, but not too often. It often feels like we're now taking care of 3 children since the 2 that live here just run wild all day. Its an interesting dynamic to have full responsibility of 1 child, but have some responsibility of 2 more.

When we first got him, we noticed he'd been sweating a lot when he slept. We were also told that he'd recently gotten over malaria. We pushed a lot of juice through him and he seems to be doing a lot better. Also, watching him eat is quite a spectacle. He eats almost anything you give him and at first, he would eat so fast, that we couldn't cut it up and get it on his plate fast enough. We think the reason for this is because he may not have always gotten enough to eat at home. However, since he sees us eat with a fork, he now tries to eat with one too. He's got surprisingly good dexterity in his fingers so he's surprisingly good at it. It also helps him to eat slower [the first day we met him, we gave him too much food and he threw up...].

Lately, he's also been saying this phrase that sounds like "ya kukuba!" We've been repeating it, not really knowing what it means. It seems to spur on whatever playful thing we're currently doing. We found out tonight that it means something to the effect of " I'm going to beat you up!" So, needless to say, we've been having a lot of fun saying it :)

WHEW. While we wouldn't have set it up this way, we've had a blast with him for the last few days. The plan is to keep loving on him and hopefully secure a court date this week [I know, I know, I say that every week]. If we don't, I doubt we'll make it back home in early October when we thought we would. So, pray for...

1. A court date this week

2. The Magistrate to grant us the care order for Gideon

3. ME. That I don't commit bodily harm to the other children living in this house [mostly kidding, but seriously...]

Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming,

Derek and Kristen

The day we met the family of... 15?

Today was another long one. We left at 9:30 for Kampala. After meeting up with our case worker, we went to a district called Mpigi; where Gideon's family lives. After talking briefly with Gideon's social worker, we went to visit Gideon and his family. When we pulled up, the place looked vacant. However, as soon as we started getting out of the car, kids seem to flock from all around. They were hanging on us and all of them were smiling. Clearly, they knew who we were and that we were coming [and most likely, that we had gifts].

There were two buildings on this family's property. I'm not sure about the one that wasn't the house, but we did get to go into their actual living quarters. The "sitting room" has a table, 3 chairs, a bench, and a few things hanging on the wall. I believe this was the biggest room in the house at about 10' x 12.' Of course, we all sat on the chairs and the kids and grandma all piled on the floor; grinning happily. They sang us a couple songs and said that they were very thankful for food we had brought them. When I started pumping up another soccer ball [I'd previously given one to Gideon], the other boys started to get anxious

So, the kids and the three of us took the two balls and for the next hour, we played. We made up games similar to volleyball, soccer, and keep away. The kids had so much fun and so did I. I was amazed at how well 12 kids could play with only two soccer balls [Either there are 12 kids, or a neighbor boy was mixed in somewhere]. Afterwards, I noticed Gideon was drawing the letter "D" over and over again in the dirt, so I reached down and did the same. Then, I traced my hand and he did the same! We've got a smart little guy on our hands ;)

We went inside one more time and the kids all sang to us again. We were served a fruit in Uganda called "Jack-fruit." We've heard people rave about how good it is.... but we all hated it. I even felt a little sick after trying a piece. I tried one more piece tonight at dinner and still didn't like it.

Right before we left, Gideon's cousin [Jackie] and aunt [Fiona], who also live in the house, asked us about helping them with going to school. Since the family only farms for their own food [feeding 15 or so mouths is no small task], Jackie and Fiona do not have money to go to school. We learned that Jackie wants to start college, but cannot afford the $300/semester for tuition. Fiona isn't sure how much school is for her, but since she would be in high school, its probably cheaper still. Kristen and I need to talk and pray about this, but it's a request we'll have a hard time saying 'no' to.

If you'd like to help out with this as well, shoot me an email and I can get you more details.... when I know more details ;)

Lastly, we learned that Gideon has been sick for the last few days and so we gave grandma some money to take him to the doctor. After that, we left to go take a picture at the Equator [I know, no big deal, right?]. The ride back to Kampala took an hour or so longer than the ride to Mpigi. This was to our dismay, since we're getting pretty tired of spending a minimum of 45 minutes in the car everytime we get in the car.

After getting something to eat, we met up with our hosts. They had a "wedding meeting" to attend. They discussed costs of everything and then we took off for home. Since we had two cars there, it was decided that it would be a good time for me to start driving. So, I drove home..... on Saturday night..... in a city of more than 2 million people.... where the rules of the road are...

...actually, I don't think there are concrete rules; maybe suggestions at best. Of course we encountered crazy traffic and one of the worst traffic jams since we've been here. At one point, I got the car stuck in a pothole so big, and so full of water, that I had to back up [in the most intense traffic EVER] and get a short running start at it to get out. Around 2 hours and about 15 kilometers [about 10 miles] later, we got home. Whew...

So, like I said, today was a long day; but a very good day. I'm so excited that everyone in Gideon's family and everyone working on Gideon's case is so supportive. It was great to meet the whole family and spend time playing with all the kids. I'm going to miss all their little smiling faces when we leave Uganda. The grandma is a sweet lady and its obvious that she loves all her grand kids. The idea that God would use us to help Gideon, Jackie, Fiona, and the rest of the family is very exciting. I'm very much looking forward to what that will all look like in the future.

Theoretically, the Child Care Order should be getting submitted on Monday for Gideon's case. We heard this directly from the parole officer for this case, so hopefully she sticks to her word and gets it done! We hope to hear about a court date for Gideon and Viola's case this week.

With that, I'm signing off. Have a mentioned that it's been a long day? Thank you to those of you who send emails and who post comments on my blog. Your encouragement and prayers mean a lot! To those of you who are secretly reading, speak up :)

Derek, Kristen [and Ellie]