The Debut

Wah - Wah - Wah... There really are no updates as far as the adoption process goes right now. The only thing I can tell you is that our case worker has gone to the Magistrate of Mpigi to discuss Gideon's Care Order again, today. We should hear from him soon. Also, neither court date has been assigned because the courts were at a 'conference' all last week. So, that's that.

In other news, we've had quite the time getting to know Gideon and having him run our lives. He runs and plays and giggles and bosses the other kids around. He's also not quite so protective of his food and is learning more English words everyday. He's quite a demand on us as its often difficult to figure out what he is saying. He's had a decent amount of diarrhea lately and he's also developed some kind of bump on his back. We're thinking it looks like a boil. When the doctor examined it a week ago, it was too small to really tell what it was, so we'll be taking him back in either tomorrow or Thursday. Despite these things, he acts fairly normal. The diarrhea doesn't seem to bother him and the bump only bothers him if it gets touched. 

This last weekend, our host family decided it would be fun to take us to their home village. We left on Saturday morning around 6:30. The drive took most of the morning and into the early afternoon. The kids mostly slept and weren't too annoying. The village consisted of several house-type structures; some small and some around the size of a house in America. There was no power while we were there [although I guess they have it most of the time]. Other than that, there are lots of trees, fields, hills, and livestock. One of the children took Gideon and I to the top of the tallest mountain hill around. It was an awesome view of several other small villages, other rolling hills, and fields. For a brief moment, I thought, "This must be where Lord of the Rings was filmed."

On Saturday evening, we attended an Africa wedding. It was an outdoor wedding and at first, everyone sat in plastic chairs in sort of a rectangular shape. Some man [father of the bride?] spoke for a long time, often cracking jokes [which I only know because other people laughed]. Then, these dancers would come and dance to the same song over and over. I guess they were the 'entertainment'. After awhile, many groups of women were paraded through. This is a tradition in Uganda. The groom is supposed to guess which one is his bride. Obviously, he knows which one it is, but the father of the bride gets to pick on him the entire time this is happening. After awhile, we decided to get up and eat. When we came back, the same thing was going on. Luckily, Gideon didn't feel like sitting still any longer, so we left to go play. All in all, it was sort of strange because there was no real ceremony that I could tell. I suppose it could have happened after we left. The ride to and from the wedding was around an hour and fifteen minutes. We rode in an 8 passenger van ... with 13 people.. including several children... on bumpy dirt roads. Needless to say, we were pretty tired.

The drive back to Kampala took a long time. It seemed like we were stopping every 20 minutes to buy local fruit and meat from the village people [its less expensive in the villages]. By the time we dropped everyone off and arrive back home, we'd been in the car for 8 hours. Between the whiny children and the smell of raw meat, we were both pretty irritable and Kristen was sick to her stomach.

SO, after all this, we decided that we needed to take some time away from our host family. Yesterday, we checked into a hotel, which is more like an apartment. We've got AC, TV, wireless internet, a shower with actual water pressure, screens on the windows [keeps bugs out], and an unheated outdoor pool. We've also got a balcony with a fourth floor view and a kitchen with all the appliances. Its nice to unwind a little from everything that's going on and just take some time for ourselves. 

Alright, because we have no actual updating for you, we decided we would make this Gideon's debut. He calls us mommy and daddy and I'll be a tornado if we have to give him up at this point. So, without further ado, here is the little guy :)

p.s: There are two videos right above. If you can't see them or can't play them, try on a computer. We can't seem to play them on our Ipods.

Thanks,

Derek, Kristen, and Gideon!

"Ya Kukuba!" [loving words toward hopeful future parents]

ALRIGHT. Here we go again. Everytime I blog, I feel like I have quite a story to tell and this time is no different. 

This story begins this last Thursday. 

Once again, we went to Gideon's district [Mpigi] to see the the magistrate about getting the care order for Gideon [the care order is what is necessary to obtain custody of a child]. We were led to believe that this step wouldn't be that difficult. We thought we would go to Mpigi, answer some questions, and walk away with it. 

To be nice about it, the magistrate was not a pleasant woman to speak with [and believe me, that is being nice]. She acted like it was absurd that we would want to obtain custody of Gideon and questioned us as to why. We also heard for the first time about a biological sister that Gideon has. She used this and many other things to say that there was no way she would sign a care order for Gideon. After awhile of her and our case worker talking back and forth, she decided that she would not give a care order until strong evidence was given that we would be fit to have custody of Gideon. Her "ruling" was that we would care for Gideon until September 25th and come back.

First of all, this goes against what we wanted to do because we do not yet have a court date for Gideon. However, our case worker seems to think that this won't be an issue. In fact, he doesn't think getting the care order will be an issue either; so much so, that he suggested that Gideon go back home with his grandparents. But, after seeing how things sometimes work in Uganda, we wanted to take no chances. So, we sent grandma and grandpa on their way and took Gideon home with us.

He cried a little at first [like literally 90 seconds]. Other than that, he's been AWESOME. He has been the most fun 2 year old to take care of for the last 3 days. He's an exceptionally bright little guy that loves to play with cars, crayons, and cell phones. He's picked up a few English words already and [drum roll please...] HE'S POTTY TRAINED! We hasn't had an accident yet. His signal that he has to pee is when he pulls down his pants. I'm confident that if we don't catch him doing this, he'll pee all over the floor. 

His little laugh is so cute that I'd prefer to tickle him all day. He also gets embarrassed easily. When he does, he covers his face with his little hands and smiles from ear to ear; flashing his bright little white teeth. He's quickly fitting in with the children who live here as well. He plays well with them and fights with them too, but not too often. It often feels like we're now taking care of 3 children since the 2 that live here just run wild all day. Its an interesting dynamic to have full responsibility of 1 child, but have some responsibility of 2 more.

When we first got him, we noticed he'd been sweating a lot when he slept. We were also told that he'd recently gotten over malaria. We pushed a lot of juice through him and he seems to be doing a lot better. Also, watching him eat is quite a spectacle. He eats almost anything you give him and at first, he would eat so fast, that we couldn't cut it up and get it on his plate fast enough. We think the reason for this is because he may not have always gotten enough to eat at home. However, since he sees us eat with a fork, he now tries to eat with one too. He's got surprisingly good dexterity in his fingers so he's surprisingly good at it. It also helps him to eat slower [the first day we met him, we gave him too much food and he threw up...].

Lately, he's also been saying this phrase that sounds like "ya kukuba!" We've been repeating it, not really knowing what it means. It seems to spur on whatever playful thing we're currently doing. We found out tonight that it means something to the effect of " I'm going to beat you up!" So, needless to say, we've been having a lot of fun saying it :)

WHEW. While we wouldn't have set it up this way, we've had a blast with him for the last few days. The plan is to keep loving on him and hopefully secure a court date this week [I know, I know, I say that every week]. If we don't, I doubt we'll make it back home in early October when we thought we would. So, pray for...

1. A court date this week

2. The Magistrate to grant us the care order for Gideon

3. ME. That I don't commit bodily harm to the other children living in this house [mostly kidding, but seriously...]

Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming,

Derek and Kristen

The day we met the family of... 15?

Today was another long one. We left at 9:30 for Kampala. After meeting up with our case worker, we went to a district called Mpigi; where Gideon's family lives. After talking briefly with Gideon's social worker, we went to visit Gideon and his family. When we pulled up, the place looked vacant. However, as soon as we started getting out of the car, kids seem to flock from all around. They were hanging on us and all of them were smiling. Clearly, they knew who we were and that we were coming [and most likely, that we had gifts].

There were two buildings on this family's property. I'm not sure about the one that wasn't the house, but we did get to go into their actual living quarters. The "sitting room" has a table, 3 chairs, a bench, and a few things hanging on the wall. I believe this was the biggest room in the house at about 10' x 12.' Of course, we all sat on the chairs and the kids and grandma all piled on the floor; grinning happily. They sang us a couple songs and said that they were very thankful for food we had brought them. When I started pumping up another soccer ball [I'd previously given one to Gideon], the other boys started to get anxious

So, the kids and the three of us took the two balls and for the next hour, we played. We made up games similar to volleyball, soccer, and keep away. The kids had so much fun and so did I. I was amazed at how well 12 kids could play with only two soccer balls [Either there are 12 kids, or a neighbor boy was mixed in somewhere]. Afterwards, I noticed Gideon was drawing the letter "D" over and over again in the dirt, so I reached down and did the same. Then, I traced my hand and he did the same! We've got a smart little guy on our hands ;)

We went inside one more time and the kids all sang to us again. We were served a fruit in Uganda called "Jack-fruit." We've heard people rave about how good it is.... but we all hated it. I even felt a little sick after trying a piece. I tried one more piece tonight at dinner and still didn't like it.

Right before we left, Gideon's cousin [Jackie] and aunt [Fiona], who also live in the house, asked us about helping them with going to school. Since the family only farms for their own food [feeding 15 or so mouths is no small task], Jackie and Fiona do not have money to go to school. We learned that Jackie wants to start college, but cannot afford the $300/semester for tuition. Fiona isn't sure how much school is for her, but since she would be in high school, its probably cheaper still. Kristen and I need to talk and pray about this, but it's a request we'll have a hard time saying 'no' to.

If you'd like to help out with this as well, shoot me an email and I can get you more details.... when I know more details ;)

Lastly, we learned that Gideon has been sick for the last few days and so we gave grandma some money to take him to the doctor. After that, we left to go take a picture at the Equator [I know, no big deal, right?]. The ride back to Kampala took an hour or so longer than the ride to Mpigi. This was to our dismay, since we're getting pretty tired of spending a minimum of 45 minutes in the car everytime we get in the car.

After getting something to eat, we met up with our hosts. They had a "wedding meeting" to attend. They discussed costs of everything and then we took off for home. Since we had two cars there, it was decided that it would be a good time for me to start driving. So, I drove home..... on Saturday night..... in a city of more than 2 million people.... where the rules of the road are...

...actually, I don't think there are concrete rules; maybe suggestions at best. Of course we encountered crazy traffic and one of the worst traffic jams since we've been here. At one point, I got the car stuck in a pothole so big, and so full of water, that I had to back up [in the most intense traffic EVER] and get a short running start at it to get out. Around 2 hours and about 15 kilometers [about 10 miles] later, we got home. Whew...

So, like I said, today was a long day; but a very good day. I'm so excited that everyone in Gideon's family and everyone working on Gideon's case is so supportive. It was great to meet the whole family and spend time playing with all the kids. I'm going to miss all their little smiling faces when we leave Uganda. The grandma is a sweet lady and its obvious that she loves all her grand kids. The idea that God would use us to help Gideon, Jackie, Fiona, and the rest of the family is very exciting. I'm very much looking forward to what that will all look like in the future.

Theoretically, the Child Care Order should be getting submitted on Monday for Gideon's case. We heard this directly from the parole officer for this case, so hopefully she sticks to her word and gets it done! We hope to hear about a court date for Gideon and Viola's case this week.

With that, I'm signing off. Have a mentioned that it's been a long day? Thank you to those of you who send emails and who post comments on my blog. Your encouragement and prayers mean a lot! To those of you who are secretly reading, speak up :)

Derek, Kristen [and Ellie]

"Africa Time"

Things just work a little differently, here in Uganda. It turns out that "Africa Time" is a real thing. Sometimes, things that should take a day, take a week. Then, just when you get used to everything moving slowly, it seems like someone set the throttle to full speed.

 At 9:00 p.m. on Sunday night, we were informed by the mother of the family that we're staying with, that we were to leave at 7:45 Monday morning to go meet our case worker in Kampala. I don't think any of us thought much of it. I was just surprised that we were going to be getting anything done this early in the week.

So, the next morning after chatting with our case worker, he informed us that Gideon and his Ja Ja [grandma] were on their way.

My legs felt a little weak at that point. We had informed our case worker that we didn't want to meet Gideon [and therefore, become attached] before a judge had given us a court date. But, for some reason, they overlooked that request. So, Gideon and his grandma, along with a sister and aunt, showed up about ten minutes later. We were delighted when Gideon didn't freak out when he saw us. After only a few minutes, Kristen was able to pick him up as we proceeded to the car! We went to our attorney's office where we continued to try and play with him. By the time it was our turn to talk to the attorney, we had him rolling the ball across the table to Kristen while sitting on my lap!

During all of this, I kept thinking, "Crap, this better work out or I'm gonna be livid" [that's the PG version anyway].

Then, we all went out to lunch. Gideon sat on my lap the whole time and straight up devoured my french fries. He was also eating some of my chicken and some of Kristen's fish strips. We learned that none of them had eaten yet that day. Afterward, we all went our separate ways.

It all seemed a blur since we weren't expecting any of it; especially in lieu of how court went with Viola's case just three days prior [see previous post]. We feel hopeful for Gideon's case because it is actually a stronger case than Viola's. Gideon is the youngest of all eleven children that they care for. Also, the grandma seems to have a little more 'with-it-ness' when compared to Viola's grandma. She seems very excited at the prospect of us being Gideon's parents.

This Saturday, we're going to visit Gideon's village [which is much closer than Viola's, thankfully]. We plan to take some gifts and some soccer balls as the kids really seem to enjoy them. It should be a good time and everyone is hopeful.

Lastly, we've been informed that we have the same judge for both Gideon and Viola's cases. This is good news because our attorney has worked with this judge on several occasions. Also, since we've already seen this judge, he know's we're here and he will [hopefully] agree to schedule our court date[s] sooner, rather than later. We were supposed to have a court date on Monday, but still have not heard from our attorney's assistant on this matter. Hopefully, we'll know in the next day or two.

Once again, thank you for your encouragement, prayer, and support. It makes us feel good that our two prospective kids would have such a loving environment to come home to!

Derek, Kristen [and Ellie].

Shell Shocked

So much has happened in the 3 days that we've been in Uganda that it will be hard to squeeze it into this post. I will try to keep it short as the kids of the family who live here want me to come outside and "bounce the ball." Rough life eh?

Everything is different here, yet there are odd similarities. All the signs are in English, yet its often hard to understand people because of their accents. Its very modern in some places, but blocks away it can look like a complete slum. Almost everyone is exceptionally nice including the family we're staying with [huge bonus]. Traffic in Kampala is a nightmare, but it's just normal to those who live here. Motorcycles are everywhere. People are always getting rides on them and their just a normal part of the taxi system in Kampala. As we were crossing one street today, we had to wait for about 200 motorcycles to go by right in a row. Also, you just drive wherever you want. There is a side of the road you're supposed to stay on, but that's about the only real rule. Other times, you just budge in and out of where you want to be; similar to what it would be like to walk down a busy sidewalk in New York... only you do it with cars, trucks, SUVS, and motorcycles.

Now, onto the real matter at hand.

Yesterday, we went to Luweero to visit Viola's probation officer and Viola's family [we've decided to call her Viola instead of Violet]. The drive to the probation officer's office was around 3 hours. When we got there, she was quite harsh with us. She asked us many hard to answer questions; some that even felt like personal stabs that the fact that we're not yet parents. She seemed to indicate that we would most likely be inadequate parents and did not know what we're doing. Halfway through this interrogation, I started to get the sense that maybe she was being harsh because she wanted us to be aware of the decision we were about to make. After all of this, we went to visit Viola

We made another 45 minute journey mostly down a road that had pot holes and ruts so big, that I wasn't sure we would make it through. When we reached the end of this road, we walked around 500 feet and arrived at Viola's home [i.e. her home is in the middle of NOWHERE]. Her grandma was coming down the path with a basket of nuts on her head. 87 years of being in the elements definitely shows on her skin and body. However, she was quite a pleasant, welcoming woman. Then, she called for Viola. Viola is the CUTEST little girl! She also had quite an attitude that first day. We couldn't really get close to her or even have her look at us without her hiding behind her grandma. I rolled a soccer ball towards her and she let it run into her leg and turned away. After a half an hour visit, we left to go back to the probation officer's office, then take her home, then return to Kampala. Once in Kampala, we ran into the worst traffic jam I've ever been in. On the way home, I was constantly nodding off to sleep and then coming back awake, confused as to what was going on. I felt like I was hallucinating. In hindsight, we had a light breakfast, and packed very little food and water for the day. I guess we just thought we would stop for lunch in the middle of nowhere, Uganda.... nope. I think we were pretty dehydrated and hungry by the day's end. We got home around 8:00 and went straight to bed.

TODAY:

We had our court date today. We met Violet and her grandmother outside the courthouse and she was much less fiesty than the day before. She let us give her some cheerios and a sippie cup of water almost right away [although, we learned an hour later that she wasn't drinking any because she didn't know she had to suck on the sippie cup]. When we went into the court house to wait, I got to sit by her and she even leaned on my leg for awhile! We showed her grandma pictures of our family and gave Viola a beaded bracelet. All seemed well.

Then, we went into see the judge. When grandma got in front of the microphone, she said some things that were inconsistent with the probationary report. When the judge basically said that he cannot grant us guardianship under these conditions, court was dismissed and we went to another room. Our attorney, probation officers, and case worker all talked the situation over. All agreed that she had told them exactly what was in the report many times before. My guess is that grandma is getting cold feet. Our attorney has a good relationship with the judge and will be re-filing our application early next week [we hope]. We're lucky that he didn't throw it out altogether. We're a little shell-shocked, but our case worker seems to think that it will get solved, it just may take a little longer.

SO... we ask for your continued prayer. I think I've said more prayers in the last 24 hours than I have in the previous 24 days. God continues to remind me that He is good and if this is supposed to happen, than it will. He also continues to remind me that doing what is right is not always easy/convenient [how fitting, eh?]. 

-------------------------

Gideon's case is sort of on hold [as we have the same attorney for both cases]. Please be in prayer for this too. If Viola's case takes longer, I'm guessing that pushes back things for Gideon as well.

I hope to get a chance to write more throughout our trip so please check back. I'm posting the updates on Facebook and Twitter, so get in touch with me there if you want notifications of the updates. Our internet is weak, but seems to be consistent [at least for the last hour].

Love ya'll!

Derek and Kristen [and Ellie]

Craziness Continues

When I'm at the grocery store or out to eat and I'm asked if I'd like a second [of whatever] for half price, my gut reaction is to always say yes. So, naturally when our adoption agency asked us if we'd like to add two-year old Gideon [ya, sweet name, I KNOW] to our adoption, we said yes :) This has only happened in the last two weeks or so. Thankfully, things have gone quite quickly and they were able to get his report sent to us in less than a week. At this point, all the lights are green and we are leaving Iowa with the intention of bringing home both Violet and Gideon!

We're stoked. Things are becoming more real all the time. Kristen has had two baby showers in the last week and our house looks as if it has been overrun by a preschool tornado. Most things are in order and we're attempting to prepare for the craziness that never ceases to ensue.

Speaking of craziness, a pretty cool thing happened recently. One of our good friends [Ellie] had a credit toward the airline that we're using. Ellie was also interested in going back to Africa for personal reasons. So, we inquired and it worked out for her to come with us! Now that we'll have two rug rats to look after, this will be a huge help. So, if you're wondering who the other white person is (sorry, had to), it's Ellie!

Thank you for your prayers, encouragement, and love through all of this! I look forward to posting many pictures and blogging while in Africa, but for now, this will probably be the last post before we're half a world away!

Here are our two kiddos!

Gideon - 2 years old

Violet - 3 years old

Hakunamatata! [Lion King]

Derek and Kristen [and Ellie]

COURT DATE [roller coaster ride]

It's been awhile. Everytime I think I should update you all on our adoption, I never know what to write because, frankly, things have been a confusing mess for quite some time. So here's the short [sort of] version..

After we were told that adopting Faith and Stecia wouldn't be possible, we were almost immediately referred to another 2 year old child named... Shakira (yes, as in 'My hips don't lie'). Her mother was homeless, pregnant, and recently widowed. Kira was taken into social services and placed in an orphanage via her mother's request. Things looked very promising for our adoption of Kira for awhile, but, then we were told that the government sees international adoption as a sort of "last resort" and wanted all family members to be documented as deceased. Since finding Kira's mother was next to impossible, we were told (again) that it would not be possible for us to adopt Kira.

As if we like roller coaster rides, we were very quickly referred to yet, another child! Violet is 3 years old and lives in a village with a family that has multiple children that they look after. Several of these children are orphaned. Since both of Violet's parents are documentedly deceased, things progressed quickly and it looks promising that we will get to bring her home. For the last two months, we've been told almost every week that it would be possible for us to get our court date. And yet, each week would end and we would have to tell our family and friends that they would "try again next week." Then, a judge in Uganda asked our agency if we would be interested in bringing home a SECOND child... Although it seems like we went through this with Faith and Stecia, things look promising that we could be bringing home two three-year old girls!

We were hoping for a court date in June because of my job. Since I teach, I wanted to miss as least amount of school possible. Then, yesterday, we finally received our court date. On August 24, we'll be appearing in court with little Miss Violet to become her legal gaurdians! We're super pumped, even though the timeline was not what we thought it would be. As far as child #2 goes, we still don't know if we'll be able to bring her home or not. We'll see as the summer goes on. AND, since I'm pretty much unemployed right now, I'll actually take the time to sit down and update you fine people :)

It's been a rocky ride this semester with the changes of our children and waiting and waiting for our court date, but we're so happy to finally have a concrete court date. The date they've chosen works out terribly for my job, but oh well, God has a plan and I'm just happy to be part of it.

Once again, thanks for all your support, ecouragement, and prayers! :)

Derek and Kristen